Get off your lazy ass...

Tired of all that "thinkin’!" Don’t want to put your PlayStaion3 controller down to be bothered with your so called, "reality!" Tired of all those liberals whining about your personal "rights!" Well then, vote Republican! That’s right, it’s free, Free, FREE!!! Republicans won’t allow things like a couple of butt fucking hippies to destroy the sanctity of marriage even if normally straight couples have done a fine job of it already. Republicans won’t support a health care plan that tells you what doctor you have to go to, even if you can barely afford the right to do it now. A Republican wouldn’t dare let those EEE-VILL terrorists off the hook by enabling our troops to be underutilized here in the states. Because even the great Glenn Beck says, "Make no mistake, they are out to kill you and me and everything we believe in!" I mean your taxes pay for our soldiers, shouldn’t they do the job they’re paid to do? That’s all the Republicans want! It’s not about war, it’s about unemployment! Let’s not forget unions! Republicans have been eroding the union power base for decades and if you vote Republican, they won’t let those whiny picketers and their "labor disputes" affect hard working Wal-Mart employees. I mean they should be happy they’re employed? Am I right? Can I get an Amen! Republicans also won’t let those liberal fairies tell you that it’s okay to murder innocent children through abortion. I mean we can’t kill human life, right? As a matter of fact, Republicans plan on creating farms for sperm and eggs from humans so that they can live out their natural lives because they’re human life too! Still not satisfied? Well look what we have here, we have a Republican that calls herself a Democrat and plans on throwing the American people a bone by trying to pass universal health care and her plan of "fiscal responsibility". But really she’ll just push the ol’ Republican agenda right along. And if you just don’t feel comfortable voting even for Hillary, hell, just say fuck it and stay home! That works too. Because a non-vote is like a vote and a half for the Republicans.

Seriously, I don’t care who the fuck you vote for, just vote for someone. Write in a vote for a Ficus tree if nothing else but drag your sorry ass to the polls and ensure what happened in Nevada last year doesn’t happen to our country. In Nevada, Democrats stayed home from the polls and we got stuck with Jim Gibbons's lame duck ass for six years. At least if we end up with a shitty president, we can ALL be responsible.