Neo Post Modern Suburban Poser Punk

Now, I’m not quite sure what to make of this cat. But more on him in a moment. Here I am at a hole in the wall bar with my good friend Karl trying to enjoy the musical stylings of Belly Button, No People and The Mapes. I was also lucky to find that this same hole in the wall bar had a vast selection of beers. Now, I’m a beer snob (lived in Germany for 3 years) and I never felt fully in tune with the punk rock movement (even the early days) and I feel more of akin to experimental Jazz (not Kenny G and shit like that but Count Basie, Miles Davis, some of the Marsallis’s stuff, Thelonius Monk, etc.) I certainly don’t possess the appreciation or knowledge for/of Punk like Karl but I do enjoy Fugazi (more of a DYI), Back Door Breaker Inners, Shapes of Race Cars and various others that Karl has burned me samples of yet I don’t know their names. Anyway, I’m in this bar, feeling like the oldest one there (and probably rightly so) hanging with Karl and the Bethanator and I order a Pacifico (being one of two Mexican beers off hand that I like, the other being Negra Modello) and that sonovabitch bartender puts a fucking lime in it. I was insulted! Now, Peppermint P, in case you read this, I was not whining about my beer being turned into fruit salad so hush woman! I was insulted because lime is put into shitty beers like Corona because they are, well, shitty and you need that lime to hide the shittyness of it. But Pacifico is not Mexican swill and therefor does not need a lime. So I picked the lime out and tossed it on the bar. Now this cat, in the photo, questions why I tossed the lime out. I look him up and down, not being very "Punk" myself, I see three things about him; 1.) He got his mohawk done at QUA in Caesar’s Palace (or some such place) and 2.) He’s wearing a Tommy Hilfiger shirt (I know, obvious, right?) 3.) He’s drinking a Corona with lime in it. With these three details in mind I can, at the very least, deduce that he is a complete Poser and a pussy. "Lime is for shitty beer." I state to him. "I have lime in my beer, that’s what you’re supposed to do in Mexican beer." He replied. "No, lime is what you put in shitty Mexican beer like yours." I spout back. He looks at me in a funny way, to which I follow up, "Yes, you drink shitty beer." He shrugs and goes back to whatever it was he was doing. Yep, a complete Poser and a pussy. Karl and I noticied throughout the evening that he seemed more concerned about primping his mohawk than almost anything else. So the next few times I have a Pacifico, I’ll be thinking of this shmuck and what ever his latest incarnation is. Thanks Karl for the great shot.