My Sweet Ride!

A funny thing about cars…

As I was driving home the other night musing about my buddy Karl’s H3 blog when a Ferrari Modena pulled up along side of me. Well, needless to say, overcompensation rarely gets bigger than a Ferrari. Then I started to think, hmm, how does my car compare to that Ferrari and a H3?

Now it’s important to understand something about my sweet ride. When I bought it I researched it extensively and I had also decided that it would be (if I could help it) the last combustion auto I would buy. Now recent safety alerts aside (all of my recalls pertaining to this particular Nissan were taken care of years before CNN got wind of them) it has proven to be a reliable and rugged little car and I am completely happy with it.

Excuse the pun, now onto the meat of the article…

Ferarri Modena – Price: Approx $150,000 or greater depending on options
MPG 16 Highway 11 city / 400 Hp / 3.6 liter V8 / 0-60 in 4.4 seconds

Hummer H3 – Price: Approx $29,000
MPG 20 Highway 16 city / 220 Hp / 3.5 liter inline 5 / 0-60 in 9.2 seconds

Nissan Sentra – Price: Approx $15,000
MPG 28 Highway 22 city / 126 Hp / 1.8 liter inline 4 / 0-60 in 8 seconds

So here is how my sweet ride stacks up…

Sentra has 31% of the HP of the Ferrari
Sentra has 57% of the HP of the H3

Sentra has 175% of the Highway MPG and 200% of the city MPG of the Ferrari
Sentra has 140% of the Highway MPG and 137% of the city MPG of the H3

Sentra has 55% of the acceleration of the Ferrari
Sentra has 115% of the acceleration of the H3

Sentra costs 90% less the the Ferrari
Sentra costs 49% less the the H3

So if I read these stats correctly in order to feel like a man and go twice as fast as I am in my Sentra and use almost twice as much gas, it will cost me 10 times as much for the Ferrari! Are they fucking nuts!

How's that for the law of diminishing returns.

And if I want to complete my homo-erogenous sense of penis envy by purchasing the H3 I’ll still use a third more gas, actually go slower and pay almost twice as much! What the fuck is going on here?

And as a final note, how many sports cars or manly trucks do you see on the road from ten years ago? How many sensible and economical cars do you see on the road from ten years ago? Well, some of the trucks are still around but if there are any sports cars like this around they are stored in Ferris’s buddy Cameron’s dad’s garage. But you still see many of those old Saturns, Toyotas, Nissans, Hondas, Fords and such trucking along. Getting people to and fro and taking care of business. With that said, I think the rest is pretty fucking obvious. Be a man and don’t react to advertising propaganda telling you what you should drive. Look at the facts, research the truth and act.