Hollywood Mandates...

In this age of sequels and remakes (the vast majority of which suck) I think it is only fair for us, the movie going public (which I understand is way down) to be entertained on some level beyond the film itself. So, all Hollywood titles should be mandated to make the following changes/adjustments for us, the moviegoer. Also, the movie posters should be become more abstract and suggestive (see image for example). Even older movies, ala Lucas style:

First movie in a series? This one is safe and open to any title they like UNLESS it is a remake and then must have THE MOVIE, THE MOTION PICTURE or BRAM STOKER'S (whether he wrote it or not as long as the film is based from a book) following the title to differentiate from the original.

Example: Bram Stoker's Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, The Movie (American Re-Make), Bram Stoker's Let Me In, The Motion Picture (The fact that the second film is ACTUALLY a vampire film is purely coincidental).

First sequel (i.e. second in series), regardless of title must have ELECTRIC BOOGALOO immediately after the 2.

Example: Jaws II: Electric Boogaloo or the even more labored: Bram Stoker's Girl with the Dragon Tattoo 2: Electric Boogaloo with Fire!

Trilogy title rule: Must have Revenge of the or Return of the (or variation therein) somewhere in the title.

Examples: Revenge of the Jaws, Piranha 3: The Revenge, Star Trek III: Spock's Revenge! or Return of the Jedi are all good examples.

A fourth film? Must have Search, Voyage, Mystery or Journey into must be in the title.

Examples: Star Trek IV, Journey into Spock's Mind, Jaws IV: Mystery of Why it was Made or Breakin' 4: Electric Voyage.

The fifth film? Okay, this one is easy. Must have ONE word immediately following the title that begins with "R" but NOT Revenge.

Examples: Alien Resurrection, Star Wars: Redacted!, Halloween 6: Retrograde, Twilight 5: Really? or Predator: Recompensator!

A sixth film. You may be thinking, "C'mon, no producer is THAT crazy or incompetent?" But I would point out Friday the Thirteenth, Star Trek or James Bond as only a few popular examples. Guidelines: At this point I think it is safe to say the title may return to a simpler time by actually using a variation of its original title, edited down to just the important bits or simply a numeral immediately following the original title.

Examples: Dragon Tattoo, Trek!, Thirteenth, Hllwn or Alien 6.

Seventh film in series: Simple, must be a "versus" film and only a "versus" film.

Examples: Freddy vs. Jason, Godzilla vs. Megalon, Jaws VII, Air Jaws vs. Dagon, Darth Vader vs. Unidentified Teenage Jedi Who Would Have Likely Kicked his Butt or Depp vs. Burton.

Eighth and further sequels? Must have increasingly goofier and longer titles which summarize the plot and make us simultaneously chuckle despite seeing the other seven or more titles and may use any element (but must be more than one) from the other rules.

Examples: Jaws VIII, Air Jaws vs. Barracuda Man 2: Electric Boogaloo the Revenge!, Friday the Thirteenth Part 23: Freddy get's a Colonoscopy from his new Doctor: Jason!, James Bond and the Spy Who Sleeps with Him and Gives Him Golden Eye. and finally The Wachowski Brothers' Star Wars 9: Lucas Reveals that Everything is Actually Part of the Matrix and Launches a New Toy Line.